was i sleeping all this time?

i quit smoking in may.
i've had a fuzzy head and mixed emotions for months.
i suddenly feel like i've woken up.
at first i felt better about that.
my head seems to have cleared, like i pulled it out of a stormy rain cloud.
but now i feel as if i let all this stuff happen and nothing is the way it was.
i've somehow gotten fatter...not even my body is my own.
i don't even know how i managed to pull off school this past semester while still maintaining a GPA of 3.5
it's like driving for 20 mins only to realize you don't remember the past 5 km, never mind changing lanes...complete auto pilot.